('Bliss Ninny' from 'Flame Warriors' by Mike Reed)
Found this lovely little site through Psychodiva and Pharyngula.
The Faith Of Britain
As I've said in my Twitter. Click. Read. Laugh. And then blog about it in a desparaging tone.
These women (and why is it nearly always middle aged, middle class, white women? I'm sure it must be something to do with them having too much time on thier hands, someone should look into that) actually believe that if they can convince the population of Britain to 'think' the world a better place, it will happen.
I laughed. Loudly and a lot.
Then I actually paid attention to what had been written.
(I'll gloss over the awful grammar for now - though it was a horror to behold.)
Numerologically this date is symbolic because the 3rd month, the 6th day and the 9th year are all multiples of 3 which is about balance - which is what we strive to achieve as humans. The time, 11.00am is a master number, or a powerful 2 (1 + 1) which is the duality of the inner and outer self, encouraging us to look within to find solutions.
What? Quite apart from the fact that the times are arbitrarily placed by whomever decides such things (I mean, we all know there's a reason we have a Leap Year, I assume?) I want to know who decided these numbes all mean anything and why.
Why is 3 about balance? Why is 2 about duality? And how the bloody hell does it encourage someone to find solutions? And what solutions? To what problems?
Why did they choose 11:00, when they could have chosen, oh I dunno... 12:00? Then the time would be about balance (1 + 2 = 3 = balance) - right? Or how about the 3rd day of the 6th month in the year 2009?
How about the 9th, 12th or 15th? Or the 18th? 21st? 24th? 27th? They're all multiples of 3. Why not one of them? They could even have done it in September, or December if they wanted. Why March specifically?
All comes to the same thing, right? Or is there something I'm missing here?
With over 80 million people concentrating their mental energies at the same time on the same day, we will unleash an irresistible psychic force that will, quite literally, make our dreams come true.
Not only is this a terribly presumptuous statement on their part, it's also demonstrably wrong.
For a start - 80 million people? In the UK? Where did they get that number from?
I did just a 30 second google search and found that, actually, they're about 20 million out. The population of UK is somewhere around '60,975,000' according to the National Statistics. Of course, that was around two years ago - but I sicerely doubt we've gained 20 million people since then.
And I'd like to see some peer reviewed papers on this 'irresistable psychic force' - because from all the reading I've done, nobody, anywhere, at any time, has EVER showed anything even slightly psychic to be real.
So. Proof please?
And the presumption? Do they seriously think they'll get every single person in the UK to follow this little show of time-wasting?
Have they thought that, perhaps, quite a proportion of the UK is either too young to comprehend what the hell they're going on about or too ill to comprehend what the hell they're going on about?
What about the significant proportion that thinks it's a load of old hooey? Or the proportion that's too busy doing real work towards helping the world (instead of sitting on their arses 'thinking' about it)? Or the proportion that's of a significantly different faith to their's?
Didn't really think that paragraph through, did they?
It is a proven scientific fact that thinking about something often causes it to happen. Some call this quantum physics. Others simply call it "faith." We ask that you open your mind to joining in with a unique psychic force that will change our lives through the power of thought.
This is the killer paragraph. This is the one even Pharyngula posted in his blog. Seriously. Read it. Laugh. Read it again and then try to make sense of it.
Again I'm stuck on the lack of peer reviewed papers. Who proved it? Where and when? And how did they do it? Why haven't they claimed the Nobel Prize yet? For surely proving something like this would merrit one? Right?
Also - I simply adore the way these people try to use quantum physics to back up their silly little theories. It's amusing because they quite evidently don't understand anything about the subject - and because they don't, they trip themselves up with it ALL THE TIME.
And then we come to the women behind the idea:
Amanda contracted Meningococcal Septicaemia and although she was only given an hour to live, she not only turned herself round in the hospital, she vowed she would dedicate her work to understanding this power she found and since then has been helping people to transform their lives.
So. What about the Paramedics, Doctors and Nurses who all worked tirelessly to save her life? Do they get no mention here? Or is she seriously trying to make us beleive that she sat at home, on her own, without any medication or care and 'cured herself' through some form of 'healing power'?
Hmmmm. Besides the fact that this is purely Anecdotal, it also smacks of outright lying.
Angelica is from North London. She was raised in a very harsh environment, however always knew that from a young age, she was being looked after by angels.
Again with the Anecdotal. Also - she always knew she was being looked after by angels? Makes me wonder what religion she was brought up under. I'm guessing some version of Christianity.
Angelica's powerful healing and psychic abilities came through naturally as she discovered that the power of the mind is key to changing one's life and therefore has transformed her own, as she does with others.
Nobody has yet explained what these psychic powers are or how they work. Seriously - don't the Nobel Prize winners get some sort of monetray prize as well? If they don't want to keep the money, why not give it to a charity or two? There's no excuse to not claim the prize, y'know.
Marlene knew of her deep psychic awareness as a child and her understanding of the Indigenous cultures have moved her to become more aware of her roots and her calling this year is to return to her homeland and then to build a retreat centre in neighbouring New Zealand.
'Indigenous cultures' of where? Essex (where she lives)? Australia (her home country)? Or New Zealand (where she plans to build a retreat)? I'm more than a little confused by the particular wording of this one.
Isabelle a 40 year old Scientist from South London had a fascination as a child with discovering and unearthing evidence, which propelled her into the work she does today.
'Scientist'? Of what? Evolutionary Biology? Cosmology? Particle Physics? Phrenology perhaps? I want to know what exactly it is she does as a 'scientist' and how doing that work lead her to believe in all this woo.
Likewise, her childhood intrigue into understanding her psychic experiences is what drives her passion today, to improve health and wellbeing within humanity, which is the basis of the work she's involved in.
Oh my goodness, whatever 'science' she works in, it's related to health. I fear for the lives of the people she's 'involved' with. Maybe she's actually a Homeopath?
She was driven to find ways to overcome her agonising daily migraine headaches; she'd suffered with for years.
OMG ARGH GRAMMAR *clutches throat and falls down dead*
For much of her adult life, [Lisa] worked as a Scientist until she discovered there was too much evidence to show there was far more going on in the Universe than she realised. Her spiritual and psychic senses awoken, Lisa was guided to go through self development to find her path.
Oh snap. There's another 'Scientist' in the group! And once again, they don't tell us which field she actually works in. Or which particular 'spiritual and psychic senses' she apparently awoke.
Lisa now works successfully helping others to heal themselves and uses a combination of her psychic and spiritual awareness with her down to earth evidence based understanding of the consequences of our thought processes.
'Evidence based'? 'EVIDENCE BASED'? Seriously?
Marjo has become increasingly aware of the power behind the 'law of attraction' as her own world has transformed.
Pardon, what? 'Law of attraction'? May I ask specifically what the bloody hell she means by that? I have a feeling her answer would delve into the realm of quantum physics and her total lack of understanding of the subject.
Marjo, 39 from London has been honouring premonitions she has had since she was a student. ... honouring the dreams she had many years ago.
This woman has prophetic dreams! And yet again, no Nobel Prize claim? (Makes me want to go check out that Prophecies R Us website again!)
I'm looking forward to seeing these people's reactions on the 7th. I'm sure they'll come up with some excuses. What do you reckon?
1. The results will be visible over the next few years
2. We didn't get as many people as expected, but smaller results should be visible over the next decade
3. There were too many sceptics and their negative energy interfered with the positive
4. *pointing out some random good news* this is only the beginning - more results will be seen over the next few years
Or some combination of the above. Think of any that I missed? Either way, I'm goingto sit back and laugh about it.